Spring
Hey,
Just a spring note to let everyone know how pathetic my life is. Spring is here in Barrow. Spring means taxes have been filed and the marriage penalty becomes the topic of conversation. How arrogant of the Democrats to call it THE marriage penalty………as if there were only one. Spring means the white folks are planning on leaving town in masses and that suddenly we are under rabies quarantine for all the teacher's pets. Last one we had was Christmas vacation time. Spring means those little shitten white and black birds are back. Last year I was so excited to hear them in the spring. I wanted to know about them, where they came from, and did their call in Barrow's sterile air make other people feel as warm as I do. I was in the cunnychuck last year when I first heard the call. I envisioned a puffin-like creature with an equally exotic name that added credence to their struggle to live. Wrong. Locals call them 'snowbirds'. If ya can't take the time to come up with a good name then I don't care either. Spring means poor road conditions. In the bland arctic spirit I have coined a special name for them. I call them, 'shitty messy roads'. It has yet to catch on. Spring means I nap. The sun is always here. Thank God they don't hay here. It is so bad that I have started referring to these eternal days as, 'very long days'. I would imagine that the only other place people are putting tin foil up on their windows is on the space station. We have killed some more endangered mamals this spring. Apparently whale encounters are way up in the spring here. I have taken to calling these whales, 'camp whales', as they must hang around camps raising havoc and must be disposed of.
My sister came up here for the last three months to serve as counselor. Not my counselor mind you, but for the school. Kerty calls her our 'room-maid'. I call her 'sister who lives with us'. We ran out of Pepsi for two days here in town. It's a good thing we are planning to return here next year as I have learned that pet deposits are not returned to renters until the snow has melted. Now this winter we have gone through thirteen 55-pound bags of dog food this year. That is 715 pounds. I question the integrity of Purina and the real weight of them dog food bags as I can only see 300 or so pounds scattered in clumps from the window here.
The excitement for the summer is a neat trip that I get to take with an old friend. We are driving from Anchorage to Dawson and then to Haines…in a U-Haul with Olie the dog. I wonder what the odds of getting a flat tire are on the wash boarded Top Of The World Highway are? May become the only flea market that stretch of road has ever seen. The semi-mobile Alaskan tinkers. Wait until the displaced Canadian commercial fisherman who was forced to take a position as a customs agent in the remote outpost of Boundary sees us coming in a rented U-Haul with Alaskan plates. I wonder what the odds are that the contents of the truck will be emptied? I have been doing my best to learn to speak Canadian but the verb tense always messes me up. I will probably say something like; "We are traveled to Dawson tomorrow, eh." Where is the US embassy in Dawson? Last time I went through the border crossing hut at Boundary I asked the roundhead there to stamp my passport. After I reloaded the truck I was able to buy back my passport for $50. That would have been roughly $8.68 US but I didn't quite get the exchange rate with him that I thought I would.
There are 9 school days left. I stopped teaching 3 weeks ago and I am approaching my own Alaskan record for having consecutive makeup days and showing of 1950's documentary videos about nothing in particular. Figure education should mirror real life. Always trying to get caught up while dealing with outdated detached information dispensed by overeducated oafs. Teaching is a gift that keeps on giving. Mainly cause we can never get it correct.
How could a town this size run out of Pepsi? That kind of irks me. I have been riding my bike to school for the last month. It is a good wakeup. It may mean getting up early an extra hour and a half each day but I feel it is worth it. Crisp air, mental health, and fitness accompany me for that one block escape each day. Sweat like a pig but if it extends my life just even one extra day in the end, it will had been worth it. Small children and their grandparents jog along side, offer encouragement, and steady me. We have a high old time. Just bringing smiles to people's faces can be a joy. What does it mean when they always ask me if that bike has a seat on it? Flock of migrating bigger birds have been confusing the weather radar out of Fairbanks. I call them 'larger birds that are not snowbirds'. Can't seem to find them in the Audibon bird field guide. Sure shitten did find the other smaller birds though. Not under warblers, wrens, or tits. They were under 'snowbirds'. There is a beauty in keeping things simple. This is very similar to the little prayer I say each year about this time when contracts are offered. It is not , "Keep it simple please", but indeed, "Please, keep the simple."
Later,
Bruce
P.S. I can be reached through screened messages from my wife on her account. We will be in Sitka, or as I call it, the place where it rains a lot and it never pays to rush or bathe.